Just So It's Healthy

   We are heading out shortly for a marathon appt. day for Colin. He is trying to hit his specialists before leaving for school next week.  (did I just say next week??) Unfortunately that means today we have a ten AM appt in town and then a 4PM appt in Denver. Say a prayer for the tiny person who is hitchhiking inside of me if you would. Long time to be vertical at this stage of the game for a pg woman!

   We have had so many wonderful people wish us and our new baby well. People know by now we weren't hoping for a boy or a girl.  We were just hoping for a baby. In trying to convey understanding and concurrence with that hope we often hear, "of course,just so its healthy."  And we do so wish for good health, long life, and all good things for our children. Twenty years of living with Colin has shown us that sometimes less than desirable health can be an unforeseen blessing of the sort we could never have realized in the absence of such challenges.

   I remember years ago listening to a lady talking about her twins who were born quite prematurely. I believe it was in the 24 week range. When she had first learned she was pregnant she and her husband had daydreamed about these two little people and what life would be like with little girls, or little boys, or a mix. Like all expectant parents you naturally picture your life as it is, then picture your life with these hypothetical two and four and 16 year olds superimposed upon it. When the babies threatened to arrive early her thoughts changed to their health.  Just please let them be healthy! Suddenly those daydreams included images of NICU's and medical intervention. Sadly, one twin did not survive.  The remaining twin was hanging on in intensive care and each week there was another complication. Before long her parents wish was, "Just let her survive."  That was not to be either. They discovered all too brutally that even life itself is not a guarantee. She swore if she was ever so blessed again that the least of their worries would be ten fingers and ten toes.

   And so it goes. You come to a point where you see perfect health as a luxury, one which you would gladly have your child enjoy, but one which you realize is out of reach, to one extent or another, for nearly all of us at some point in life. You gladly trade that luxury for the privilege of simply living with this little person. Nothing else really matters after that.

   I have watched Colin struggle with his body that so rarely does the 'right thing'.  Sometimes I have laid in bed and wept for him.  Moreover I have wept in shame at my own frustrations, so minor in light of the load he was carrying. And I thanked God for every single moment we have been honored to witness the miracle of his life.

   We do so hope for excellent health of this new baby. Mostly though, we just hope he or she "is". Life is enough.

   I was fortunate enough to "meet" the folks at Woodstone Prairie along this blogging adventure. You won't want to miss her Thoughts of a Mom essay. If you are not familiar with the reference to it, you may access A Trip to Holland here.  Now go hug your kids y'all!  I am off to to the doctors.

Comments

[Maura]

Thank you for linking to my blog... I can't take any credit for "Thoughts of a Mom" but it touches me each time I read it. I'm glad you like it too.

There is nothing like struggling for your child's life to make you appreciate the incredible gift of life and health, is there?

Once, at Children's Hospital, we were waiting for an elevator, and my R was bouncing around laughing and being silly. A lady waiting with us was watching R, and smiling at her antics, and I said something to her about what a blessing a happy child is. Our eyes met with understanding and she agreed, saying that only someone who has a child who has really struggled... will truly appreciate what a gift their children's smiles and laughter are.

I hope your day yesterday wasn't too long and tiring...(those trips to Denver can be exhausting can't they? and I'm not even pregnant! :o)

have a good day!

[Christine]

Thank you for sharing these beautiful words of wisdom.

[Christine]

Thank you for sharing these beautiful words of wisdom.

[Donna Marie]

God Bless you, Kim for sharing your heart with us....we have so very much to learn from you! Bless you and your wee one! Sending this with a prayer for your entire clan...hug Colin for me will you? He just inspires me!...and you can tell him I said so too! :o)

[Laura Guiang]

I thought alot about this very thing lately, being pregnant myself and It's just plain hard for our one of each world to understand that the sex and even the health of our children are out of our hands for the most part and the peace that comes from WANTING the will of God, what ever that may be. Even my well meaning friends are praying for a girl for us...how silly, I think, the baby is what it is, praise God, I did not get to choose, what do I know, only He can see the future and what would be best for all. We have to just TRUST God that made it all. So easy to say, I know but it's harder, I assure you to want what you want so badly that anything else would break your heart. Collen is a terrific young man and I can only imagine how much he will be missed when he's away at school-so many will benefit from knowing him in Arizona, however.

[Dawn]

Kim, thank you so much for sharing this beautiful post. Prayers for you all - I'm off to hug my kids. :)

[Dani]

Thank you for such a beautiful post.

Hope your day goes by...we spent yesterday at the endocrinologist with Quinnie. We got some good news...his thyroid levels are normalizing and we can lower his dosage and hopefully work toward weaning him off of his medication. He is growing...almost 50 lbs. and 40" at 6 yrs. Of course, I'm not sure what I'm going to do for diapers when he outgrows his Huggies! *smile*