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May 28, 2008


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Profound. Very well stated. I'm so glad you linked to Alice's daughters article. I need to go pray now--that is how much you impacted me today.


So beautifully expressed. I'm touched and encouraged again--yes it is a "beautiful mess".

Wendy in VA (now in MD)

Well done! This is a keeper. :o) And thank you for the links. I can relate to so much of this... I pray everyday for the strength and wisdom to keep the negative cultural -- and familial -- influences at a minimum for our dc. And I thank God for the gift of dh and our dc, and for the graces that have kept dh and I together in spite of our upbringings. :o)


I think so many of us suffered the fallout of the 'me' generation...that doctrine is truly empty.
Well said, friend.


Kim--your writing is so compelling and accurately articulate--it must be the pregnancy (and they claim our brains shrink--maybe they do, because our hearts enlarge).

I want to link to this and add a little of my own, if you would allow me. It is something that needs to be expressed, it might bring clarity and exposure, which would make room for conviction, repentance and healing.


Thank you for your beautiful articulation of so many of my own thoughts. They tell an amazing truth lived by so many women raised by feminists.

Ted (the friend's high school son)

As I was going down the list of authors, EVERY SINGLE woman was a feminist of some sort. Alice Walker especially made me say "ugh". In a list of 37 authors, I am down to eight who are writers of decent morals. As I look into their work, however, I keep narrowing it down further. It really creeps me out how the public school system is trying to indoctrinate us with feminism, communism, homosexuality, etc. I have learned to keep a wary eye out. Thank you very much for the tips.


My mom was a Christian stay at home mom busy at home with an organic hobby farm too. And yet she always told me - even at a young age - not to get married, and children are a burden....when I announced my first pregnancy she said, "Well, you could always have a really hot bath!" (there was a rumor that that would cause a miscarriage). So, this thinking had permeated the church, too. My sister and I always hesitate to announce our pregnancies to her........so sad!



I never quite bought the total feminist line, but one college roommate did. I just watched, and laughed, at first, as "Men" became the enemy. Creepy.

Yet even some of that feminist thought crept into my early marriage, which I found very stifling. The "service" aspect just hadn't occurred to me. Even when expecting my first child, I figured I'd be right back to "work" in a few weeks; my career was important, after all. That child is nearly 18, and I'm still haven't gone back to work, LOL!!

Thanks for a thought-provoking post!

Barb McK

I think there are quite a lot of walking wounded in our ranks, who have no idea how to recover from the illness of feminism, great essay as always. I love that idea of service vs. slavery....an issue I speak about around here, daily!


Kim, wow! This really resonated with me. When I was pregnant with my first child, I heard over and over again about how difficult it was going to be and very few words about how wonderful. My grandmother and mom are both amazing mothers but I think this sense of enslavement very subtly worked its way into their minds as well. Can you imagine my surprise when I actually loved being a mother - joyfully, blissfully? And if I can I will (again) quote St. Francis de Sales: "We can easily believe that the Blessed Virgin was so happy carrying Jesus in her arms, that her happiness prevented weariness or, at least, made her weariness delightful."


What a treasure of a post! Life is indeed a beautiful mess, and I'm blessed beyond measure with a husband who loves me and four precious kiddos. Would you mind if I link your post/blog in one of my blog posts? Please email me with your decision. May God bless you!


Thank you. Your words have affected me deeply, and I can just say thank you. God bless you for your example.

Maria P

I really understand where you're coming from as a child of divorce coupled with so much cultural negativity.

Appreciate your post.


Thanks for this! I resonate with Rebecca's feelings. Although not specifically stated as a an ideology by my mother, it was made known that career should be primary, and that a life focusing on marriage and children was designed for simpletons, and was emotionally dangerous. I grew up feeling masculinized, and not knowing why.


I agree that willing and joyful motherhood and wifehood has been degraded in populist culture, to a point where it is considered to be a "failure" to choose these things rather than an outside job. But I do see why women of my mother's generation took this stance: they had seen how vulnerable (emotionally, physically and financially) a women who did not have education or other resources could be when caring for children. I think they had a real fear that their daughters would be placed in the positions they had been, and so over-reacted and threw the "baby out with the bathwater" so to speak.

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