parting thoughts from the High Desert

Susan will be closing her blog down soon.  If you have not printed pearls of wisdom you wish to remember from there now is the time to do so.  In one of her last posts Susan left us with some final comments about home education, education in general really.  She reiterates my own feelings about gentle yet responsible teaching.  A few highlights:

<<Read. Think. Do. But don't overdo.>>

Enough said there. I love her emphasis on doing but not OVERdoing which is a great temptation in our day of co-op classes, unit studies, and ideology overload. Which things do we do?  She answers, 

"We did real things. We tried to avoid things that kept us from the real things, the good things, a true education."

 This bears consideration.  To flesh that out further I would warn against that which is contrived, make-work, or cumbersome in any way. Avoiding doing things out of guilt, as in, "Everyone else is...."  One homeschool mom confided the other day that she felt almost guilty because her days have been running so smoothly.  Instead of reveling in that harmony, she wonders if that means she ought to add more.  That is a feeling many of us have had.  We shouldn't.  We should be zealously guarding the margin in our lives. That is healthy.  That is necessary.  It is dangerous to be without one. 

Susan balances the creative gentle learning with this:

"..we all took it seriously.  If one wants to create a learning lifestyle atmosphere, it takes a lot of work to do it.  If we are home educating, then education is not to be shrugged off."

It is tempting to lose ourselves in lovely visions of children teaching themselves calculus, painting watercolors, and keeping marvelously tidy rooms while we knit and catch up on all the classics we missed.  Reality is a bit messier.  Habit formation and the mastery of skills take a lot of deliberate effort. 

It is easy to get caught up in all the many things vying for our time and attention. Yes, we paint.  We make music.  We do many lovely things together. But we are deliberate as well. We are purposeful in our choices.  And we "work within the reality of our situations."  

What Susan, as Art Robinson and Andrew Campbell and others (see sidebar right) are sure to choose daily are reading, writing, and math.  They are the big fish which should not be shrugged off. Beyond that most healthy active families will have countless opportunities to explore their worlds.  

<<Besides prayer, the three most powerful tools in a homeschooling parent's toolkit are:

1. Example
2. Example
3. Example

In other words, at the most basic level of all, do as Gandhi said, and "be the change you want to see in the world.">>

This is the advice I so often wish to tattoo on my forehead.  It is that simple in the end. Be what you wish them to be because they will be molded and formed in large part by the example you provide.  Elaborately coordinated curriculum cannot compensate for poor example. Better to have a little with peace than plenty with strife.  Do a few things well.  Be loving.  Be responsible. Never tell yourself that is not enough. It is everything. 

Comments

[Juli]

I love this post. I always feel that maybe I'm not doing enough. Especially when I get around other homeschooling ladies that are constantly running and have their children in all sorts of activities. I'm looked at strangely because I didn't sign my kids up for VBS. I could site many examples where I'm looked at strangely, because I'm not frazzled with outside activities.
Oh, and I have the same pink milk crates in my middle daughters room for her books.

[Sarah]

"One homeschool mom confided the other day that she felt almost guilty because her days have been running so smoothly. Instead of reveling in that harmony, she wonders if that means she ought to add more. That is a feeling many of us have had. We shouldn't."

I can really identify with this! When things are going well (and they often are), I find myself thinking, "shouldn't this be harder?" So I add something, or some-things, we find ourselves spinning out of alignment, and I'm back to square one.

Thanks for the reminder to slow down and savor each day- to do a few things well.

[Donna Marie]

I actually had a beautiful day...it was HARD but we did it...it clicked...it worked...I did it all without chocolate and I survived and was AMAZED. I kept my hands holding on to my chair when I had the urge to go print off another thing or find yet another book. If I had done that, we would have lost our rhythm. I kept my mommy-notebook handy and just kept noting things instead of jumping around. I did the fastest clean of the main areas of the house before we started without looking at the clock (this is not only for baby-safety but for mommy-sanity) I concentrated on doing some things very well and I will just do the things we didn't do tomorrow with the answering machine on. I mentored them like an iron hand in a velvet glove...to quote the guy at Home Depot...lol

I love my job. It's not easy, but is a sweet struggle for sainthood.

I love your ideas...I WAS looking for some printable number pages...I have been putting everything into binders lately to make things last from one person to another. If I had only been this organized 8 children ago...

And! I love your model. Where did you find him?
gotta go...the baby wants to eat the smallest brown stair...lol a hands-on guy that gets into his work....

[Tracey (Connections)]

Thanks, Kim.

[Susan (Taffy)]

Thank you for writing this as it was something I really needed to hear today.

[regan]

you'd think after almost 10 years of homeschooling i'd know all those things already! but i don't. and i am glad you shared them. my favorite bit-"do a few things well." and with that you have left us with some great things to ponder over the summer. thank you.

[Amber]

"be the change you want to see in the world."

It's so funny - but I actually quoted this same quote to myself today - trying to remind myself that what is *most* important is how my children 'feel' about themselves & the world ... and only after that should there be space for the 'what' of 'what we know'. While I so strongly believe in education I know in my heart that the PRIORITY must be *piece of mind*... if I am overwhelmed by everything I trying to do/be/create for them & my energy & patience and wisdom are undermined by that then I am missing the whole point.

Thanks Kim for helping to strengthen my resolve.